[ What's really fucking him up initially, what's fucking him up too much to feel comforted by Mace's voice, too much to notice the disruption to the furs is-- he's not doing that. He's not making it. He's not lighting himself up, it's just happening like it's beyond his control. The same way his heart rate is beyond his control. He's staring down at his hand with lips parted and staggering uncertainty gripping at him.
It's a kind of body horror he can't describe, that maybe Mace won't understand. Having this thing that's part of him, that he knows intrinsically, that he has always controlled suddenly be different is like-- it's like if colors switched in your eyes, and everything red was now green. You can still see, it's just wrong and that sudden change, that wrongness, it's scary.
I think someone was murdered here, it was written on the wall--
Why the fuck are they still here then--
Shhhh-
Ian's body moves faster than his mind. His knees were already up, it takes absolutely no thought for them to start skidding against the rock with enough force to drive him backwards, half-stumbling, half dragging Mace with the clutching grip they've got on each other's hands. It fills the cave with papery scuffing sounds, and it's punctuated by the sharp, staggering gasps that suddenly replace his breathing - that pre-hyperventilation sound. It's knee-jerk, it's pure flight, pure fear, instant distancing. Blue light illuminates them like a goddamn beacon, like bioluminescent fish in the deep, dark parts of the ocean where the sun can't reach.
He can't make it stop.
It isn't strong enough for him to see what's in the distant dark. ]
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It's a kind of body horror he can't describe, that maybe Mace won't understand. Having this thing that's part of him, that he knows intrinsically, that he has always controlled suddenly be different is like-- it's like if colors switched in your eyes, and everything red was now green. You can still see, it's just wrong and that sudden change, that wrongness, it's scary.
I think someone was murdered here, it was written on the wall--
Why the fuck are they still here then--
Shhhh-
Ian's body moves faster than his mind. His knees were already up, it takes absolutely no thought for them to start skidding against the rock with enough force to drive him backwards, half-stumbling, half dragging Mace with the clutching grip they've got on each other's hands. It fills the cave with papery scuffing sounds, and it's punctuated by the sharp, staggering gasps that suddenly replace his breathing - that pre-hyperventilation sound. It's knee-jerk, it's pure flight, pure fear, instant distancing. Blue light illuminates them like a goddamn beacon, like bioluminescent fish in the deep, dark parts of the ocean where the sun can't reach.
He can't make it stop.
It isn't strong enough for him to see what's in the distant dark. ]